Let me be quite hon­est. The down­side of a win-win deal is that it requires more time and more work. The trend is to slide back and go straight back into the old mod­els. When we see that our child has failed, maybe we will go again to grate, aban­don or over-man­age our chil­dren and say, “It won‘t work.” Accord­ing to Stephen Cov­ey, the five ele­ments of a win-win agree­ment are: as men­tioned above, if two proac­tive, mis­sion-ori­ent­ed and orga­nized peo­ple meet, effi­cien­cy can go far beyond what we can accom­plish on our own. Win/Win is a syn­er­gis­tic sit­u­a­tion in which both par­ties can ben­e­fit each oth­er. Win/Win takes a cer­tain amount of invest­ment to pro­mote its appear­ance. The first step is to rec­og­nize the sta­tus of our human inter­ac­tion at a giv­en time. We must ask our­selves not only what we want, but also what the oth­er par­ty wants from a par­tic­u­lar sit­u­a­tion, if we con­sid­er that it is nor­mal to leave if no com­mon agree­ment is reached (Win/Win or No Deal). The oth­er thing to note, you don‘t cre­ate “agree­ment” or “buy-in,” just a “ques­tion­ing” if you stop the “I” language.

It is the lan­guage “we” that trans­forms them: “This is what we want to achieve if we use the fol­low­ing resources in our fol­low­ing guide­lines, our stan­dards, etc. Fourth, define respon­si­bil­i­ty. Tak­ing respon­si­bil­i­ty for the results brings teeth into the win-win agree­ment. If there is no respon­si­bil­i­ty, peo­ple grad­u­al­ly lose their sense of respon­si­bil­i­ty and begin to accuse cir­cum­stances or oth­er peo­ple of poor per­for­mance. But when peo­ple are involved in set­ting the exact stan­dard of accept­able per­for­mance, they feel a deep sense of respon­si­bil­i­ty for achiev­ing the desired results. One of My favorite videos of Dr. Cov­ey is when he describes his own expe­ri­ence with his son and their win-win agree­ment. The con­cept of a win-win agree­ment comes from the work of Dr. Stephen R. Cov­ey and his orig­i­nal book on The 7 Habits of High­ly Effec­tive People.

The win-win agree­ment is a great tool to help fam­i­lies find the right bal­ance. The next step is to start draft­ing an agree­ment. Dr. Cov­ey describes 5 ele­ments of an effec­tive win-win agree­ment It is a fact that peo­ple think dif­fer­ent­ly because of dif­fer­ences in faith, cul­ture or expe­ri­ence. Some are dom­i­nant right-brain, which are greater in imag­i­na­tion and cre­ativ­i­ty, while oth­ers are left-brain dom­i­nants that are supe­ri­or in analy­sis and num­bers. How can we reach agree­ment on these dif­fer­ences which, at the end of the day, ensures that all human beings can car­ry out their tasks and duties in order to achieve the same desired result? What do you think of the WIN-WIN agree­ment? This means you can use the same items for a winner/winner or a winner/lose, depend­ing on your approach.